Say "Tofurky!"

Yes. There's only one day until Thanksgiving, which means that, on a scale of one-to-excited, I'm dressed up as a turkey right now. Because the great thing about Thanksgiving is that, like most holidays, it's all about eating (the exception being Christmas, which – in order – is all about Jesus, presents and matching pajamas. Wait, what?), but unlike most holidays, Thanksgiving doesn’t really pretend to be about anything else (like, who do you think you’re fooling, “Independence” Day, you’re just another excuse to eat hamburgers – not that we should need one). Sure, there’s the business of “giving thanks,” but, c’mon, what are we mostly being thankful for? That’s right: Stuffing.

Then again, Thanksgiving is about some other things. I mean, not to get all Tevye on you, but there is the matter of tradition. Like, tomorrow, I’ll continue the once-a-year tradition of waking up early expressly to watch a Roker-hosted event, followed by the traditions of wondering when they’re ever going to pull the “Ask Jeeves” balloon out of rotation, breaking out the Christmas music (which has a way of getting some pretty suspect artists onto the iPod, every year), saying, “Okay, this is the last thing I’m eating until dinner,” about once every half-hour, sitting at the “kids” table and loving it, trying both cranberry sauce and asparagus – again – deciding that I still don’t like cranberry sauce or asparagus – again – avoiding tomato juice altogether (Because that? Is just gross.), and being in the presence of more kinds-of-pie in one room than I knew was possible outside of a Smith-family reunion.

And I guess Thanksgiving is also about pilgrims, though weirdly, you kind of stop hearing about that after grade school. And, last but certainly not least, it’s also a great excuse to break out Pieces of April (an awesome Thanksgiving movie, even if Katie Holmes has kind of ruined Katie Holmes for me) and, even better, the OC: Season One DVDs, to watch what is one of the best episodes ever. Hey, you celebrate your way, I’ll celebrate…with the Cohens.

Oh, and in a preemptive strike against what I’m guessing we’ll be seeing a lot of, tomorrow morning: Shut up, commercials for Rent. I mean, nothing against Rent, which I’ve never seen nor heard nor know anything about outside of that one song with all the counting that reminds me of Thanksgiving, but those commercials are just a little…too much, what with all the fireworks and the twirling in the streets and the “Baby – we’re the lucky ones.” It’s like, I know you’re in the East Village of New York City struggling with life, love, AIDS, and the impacts they have on America, but could you be a little less exhausting about it?

Then again, you're probably wondering why I don't just Tivo through those, but...let's forget about that bit of continuity for the sake of the plotline, okay? Good plan.